One little goal at a time

I'm back! And back at it!
I have successfully worked out four days this week. Rewind to two weeks ago when I worked out...NEVER.

Tuesday- my trainer aka my smokin' hot hubby had me run 12 mins on the treadmill. 12 mins=gross. I hate running...it's terrible...it's awful...it's my equivalent to uuumm...well I hate it. I think I complained the WHOLE time and didn't even make it to a mile. Really? A healthy 24 year old can't run a mile in under 12 mins? I ran it in 12:45 and it was painful. Ugh. The thing I did like about Tuesday's workout was learning some boxing and kickboxing. Jab, jab, cross!

Thursday- we worked out again. I was dreading it and did not want to do it at all. I don't think I will ever like working out. But, I did it and I am sore. On Friday, my sis needed me to watch Delaney at my parents' house. It was supposed to be a rest day but I was there, the treadmill was downstairs, the girls were sleeping, and I had no excuse to not at least walk! I got down there and thought...hmm..I will try to run. By golly, I ran a mile in 11:45...a WHOLE MINUTE faster than Tuesday. Now, I know there are some people who can run a mile in like 5 mins or even under, but I am pretty dang proud of myself. First, for the attempt to work out. Second, for choosing to run. Third, for beating my time from Tuesday.

Fast forward to today- JJ told me my workout was simple- 45 mins of straight running on the treadmill. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? I told him there was NO WAY that I could do that. He said, "Well, now, you have already beaten yourself." While he was on his bike ride, I procrastinated and found excuses to not go down there and run. To be honest, I was scared...maybe of failing or maybe of succeeding? All I was thinking about was running at like a 6 mph speed and how that was going to be impossible. But, JJ didn't say as fast as I can, he said, "Shoot for endurance." I can't explain it, but my mind automatically goes for the "big goals" not the "little goals."  I look at not running a mile in like 6 mins the way my fellow crazy, good CC runners did as a huge failure. Keep in mind...I haven't ran for longer than 30 mins since Sophomore in HIGH SCHOOL!! During this year of bettering myself, I have decided to focus of the little goals.
My first little goal that I didn't know I would accomplish until it happened- beating my previous mile by a minute. : )
Now back to that 45 mins on the treadmill. I got down there and I was throwing myself a pity party down there. I'm sore, I can't do this, 45 mins?, I hate running...etc. I pressed that 3 mph button and I started at a small, slow pace. You know what I found? That was harder than running at like a 4 or 5mph pace because it was almost like I was forcing my body not to run. I kicked it up a notch and I stayed at a good 4 or 5 during most of the run. It got to be about 20 mins into the run and I wanted to quit so bad. This was grueling. I put my sweatshirt over my time and distance. I didn't want to look at those seconds just slowing turning into minutes. I finally understand what it means as a runner to push through the wall.
At one point, I was running at a 7mph. It wasn't for very long (maybe a minute here and there) but I felt myself wanting to crank it up. JJ came down to check on me knowing my time was about up and I wanted to keep going. DID YOU JUST READ THAT? I WANTED TO KEEP GOING!
And I did...for 15 more minutes than was requested or required of me. I am beyond proud of myself.

I need to quit comparing myself to the CC runners in knew in high school and I need to realize that speed isn't my issue. It is my mental stability and willingness.
I like the little goals that lead to the big goal- a better me at 25.